Monday, August 13, 2012

Feeling Frustrated

So, here's the deal:

I've been in a funk. After hitting the 10-pounds-lost mark last Thursday, we then celebrated Daughter's new job with dinner out Thursday night (which prompted the Restaurant Edition of "It's the Little Things"), and then I celebrated my milestone by indulging in a bit of pizza Friday night (which I'm told is one of the worst foods you can have...but considering that it used to be a Friday night tradition...plus at least once during the week, I figured I could do a couple pieces of thin crust for only the 3rd time in a month).

And now the scale has climbed a pound again, and I can't seem to shake it.

I figured that if I cheated just a wee bit, the numbers might go up, but they'd come right back down again. But it's kind of like prices at the gas pump - the numbers seem to go up so quickly and easily and take so much longer coming down.

Add to that the fact that all the "good" food I got at the store last week is gone and I really need to go shopping again. But I hate going to the store. So there aren't a lot of good choices (there aren't a lot of choices, period) in the house.

Except Greek yogurt. There's still plenty of that.

Add to THAT the fact that I was fixing the last planned dinner this evening, and it was a bust. It was a new recipe for chicken and rice. I "healthy-fied" it by using low fat cream of celery soup and low fat cream of chicken soup, and the white Minute Rice was being replaced with brown rice. You mix all that plus a can of water in a baking dish, lay the chicken breasts on top of it, sprinkle on an envelope of onion soup mix, cover it with foil, stick it in the oven at 250 degrees and forget about it for 3 or 4 hours.

I even put in extra water, because I know brown rice soaks up a lot. But after 3 1/2 hours, when I pulled the food out to have supper, the rice was STILL hard. Not nutty-crunchy hard - I've come to expect that from brown rice - but "I just took this out of the bag" hard. Inedible.

The last few days, for the first time since I started this, I've been hungry. And being hungry makes me cranky. And every time Daughter mentions that the Neverending Pasta Bowl started at Olive Garden today, it's enough to make me cry...I want some fettucine alfredo so badly.

Yesterday I had thought we'd come home after church and have lunch here because it was the first Colts game of the preseason and we had people coming over. But the game started late enough that there was time for our usual lunch out after church. The problem was, I didn't know ahead of time where we were going, so I hadn't been able to look at the online menu and make my choices.

Did you know that Chili's considers 750 calories to be "light"? I was so frustrated. Even their salads have so much other stuff in them that they rack up the calories really quickly. I finally settled on a turkey sandwich and substituted a side salad with honey-lime vinaigrette for the fries that normally come with it. But the sandwich was sooooo biiiiiiig. I only ate half (brought the other half home and had it for supper) and still felt like I was eating nothing but bread. 

PARADIGM SHIFT:
**Okay, this is a good thing, because I used to not even think about the bread. The bread was what I liked. And now it has become part of the enemy camp. So the thinking processes are changing.**

I looked at the calendar today. Yep. Four weeks. I'm about right on schedule. This is the point where, in the past, I've started to lose my resolve. I've started to loosen the reins just a little bit. Not be as diligent as I should. Start to grab whatever's handy and tell myself that an occasional binge will get the "wants" out of my system, then I can get serious about it all again. Except I have a habit of not getting serious again. Once I fall off the wagon, I get upset with myself, decide it's not going to work after all, and forget the whole thing.

This morning I went out and walked/jogged my four miles. 

**DETOUR OF THOUGHT: Set a new best time in the process - 1 hours 17 seconds.**

And I thought, maybe if I just keep walking and walking and walking and walking, I can eventually walk off this extra pound. This is not healthy thinking. One pound shouldn't bother me this badly.

I don't mind going up a pound. What I mind is not being able to get it off again within a day or two. What I mind is having that happen at the same time that the food supply in the house doesn't have as many choices as I would like.

::deep breath::

Okay. Time to suck it up, quit whining, plan my new grocery list, and get the goods foods in the house again. (Anyone want to go to the store for me?) (Seriously, I hate it that badly.) I know that if I just keep sticking to the plan, things will right themselves again.

7 comments:

  1. Jenni--you are doing great! Has it occurred to you that you might be gaining muscle weight? I'm sure all that walking is building some muscle.

    I hope you got a good grocery list written out and pick up enough that you'll hopefully have little snackies left when things start running low.

    You know your pattern, so you can avoid falling into the pitfalls. Keep up the good work!

    Joell

    ReplyDelete
  2. I totally feel you on this one. I feel that if I cheat-even a healthy cheat-it ends up showing up on the scale. It's rather frustrating but you are such an inspiration. You are doing such a great job!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thank you! I don't know about the "inspiration" part - I'm just putting it out there like it is. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. But, My Dear Jeni... It's just a little plateau. Let your body get used to the metabolic change again and the one pound gained will become two pounds lost. Especially if the walking continues consistantly. [Here's a pizza tip for you (I can't eat carbs either so I learned this one a while back and it works great. Low carb tortillas, with fat free cheese, Turkey pepperoni, whatever veges you like and low carb (or sugar free) tomato sauce.

    Place a tiny bit of olive oil on a baking sheet, very lightly dust with corn meal, place the tortilla over the sprinkled meal, spread sauce, cheese, meat, toppings and bake at 375 till cheese melts and starts to look pizza-y. cool, cut, fold, eat. Let me know how you like it. you can also use the high fiber tortillas, and it can also be made as a desert, using sugar free jam, chopped nuts and or sugar free chocolate syrup. ] <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooohhhh...forget the pizza (not a fan of pepperoni of any kind), but I like that chocolate/jam/nuts combo you're talking about. Sounds just right for a sweet tooth fix. :)

      Delete
  5. I totally understand your frustration, but don't let it derail you. That one pound will go away again. The gas price analogy is a good one. And don't forget, the scale may lie (muscle does weigh more than fat) but the clothes don't! I've been doing Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred plus our Half Marathon training, and the scale doesn't move very much. BUT, workout shorts that were too tight for public consumption are now fitting me to where I would actually walk down my entire street to the mailbox in them (I haven't, but I would). I'm at the in-between stage of my current jeans being too baggy but my smaller jeans being too tight. So while my scale still reflects where I was over a month ago, my clothes don't. So try to focus on the progress you posted about where your all-over weight has minimized and localized, and don't let this get you down too badly. You can do this. You will do this. And you are more than a number on a scale. (Can you tell I got my Pinterest fix in this morning?)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Been looking at the motivational posters again, eh, Jennie? ;)

      Delete